Tuesday, May 31, 2011

I'm a mess

Its the first day of summer for us and what do we do? Put the kids in front of the t.v. so I can shower and get ready. It's already too hot to be outside for too long if you aren't in water.
The last two Sundays at church we have had lessons on being a good parent, being kind and teaching your kids good things. I love the lesson but it makes me feel a little guilty about getting upset and frustrated so easily. I know this lesson is directed for young mothers and I know I need it so I am trying to take things slowly and enjoy everything. Still my kids fight and I raise my voice and I'm not sure how to stop it. I know it will pass but I really want to remember to have fun with my kids and I hope that they remember me as playing with them when they are older.
Today I received a ton of help. Apprently I looked like a mess. I was lucky enough to have a lot of help and I am so appreciative of it. We went to Costco and I thought I would be able to fill up my cart quickly and get out before feeding Claire. We got almost everything done when she started throwing a fit. She was hungry. I couldn't get out of the store quick enough. I took her out of her carseat and held her as I pushed around a cart filled to the brim with groceries. There were little kids everywhere and they kept telling their moms that this baby (my baby) was crying. I think everyone in Costco could hear her. Siena was hanging off one side of the cart and Ben was in front of her squishing her just to make her mad. It was not helping me be a happy mom. We got in line and a very nice man emptied my cart for me. Then we checked out and another man walked my cart to my car and his at the same time. It was so nice. He offered to put my food in the car but I just couldn't let him do that. We made it home finally and I fed Claire. We all went to take naps and woke up much happier. The kids played nicely together and wore themselves out. Then at 7:30 there was a knock at the door. The Beehives came by with a full dinner for us for tomorrow night. Lasagna a salad and cookies. I am so excited I don't have to think about dinner for tomorrow. I am so excited about it. I hate planning dinners out. So this day will end a lot better than it started and hopefully tomorrow I won't yell at my kids.

4 comments:

Jennie Larsen said...

I hear you on all this! I often feel the same way! :) If you want my opinion/advice, read on...otherwise stop here and know you're not alone! :) Lately I've been trying to be better with my kids, and I've found that if I just get down at their eye level and play, talk, dance, etc with them, we have more moments of sheer joy. We still have plenty of fits, but there are more great moments. Also, I'm trying not to expect as much productivity on things that don't really matter. Easier said than done, but totally worth it. Don't be too hard on yourself; some days are just TV days regardless of the season! "Indulge" in popsicles outside as much as possible, be OK with having dirty kids and a dirty house sometimes! I'm also trying to plan something to do (at home or somewhere else) each day to keep us all sane. (All this is stuff I'm TRYING...I'm still struggling to get it all working like magic...but it's not magic....take it one day at a time) I love your attitude: tomorrow is another day, maybe it will go better! Good luck; and call me whenever you're frustrated. I'll answer if I'm not busy yelling at my kids! (or hopefully playing happily with them!)

Drew and Edith said...

one thing i like about reading your blogs is that you're honest. i feel you on your frustration. sometimes i think the whole neighborhood/store can hear me yelling at my kids. i'm glad you got a reprieve w/dinner from the YW. i hope things get easier for you.

Daniel Stone said...

I'm with you Kristi! A few weeks ago, I had gotten angry at Scarlett in the morning and yelled at her. The rest of the day turned out pretty well and we did some fun things. Later that night when she was going to bed, we were talking about the day and all she said was that I had been mean that day. It made me so sad that's the only thing she remembered out of the whole day! :( I am trying to do better, but it's not always easy.

Wendi said...

I totally feel your pain, Kristi. This whole house thing has turned me into the worst mother ever-at least the worst I've ever done since I've had kids. I was even better when Landon was a baby and I had 3 tiny ones!!

And remember-I'll still come over during Vacation Bible School!!